Here's what I mean: I will make a complete and total fool out of myself, will just bust loose and have fun, because I could care less what people think of me. On the other hand, I think that I look horrible, on my best days, I'm semi-good looking, but missing all the little things (I have yet to figure out EXACTLY what those are.) that would make me attractive, and on bad days, I'm a fat, ugly nerd with no fashion sense.
I went to Buckle yesterday, and bought a black Roar button-up shirt with tons of embroidery, with designs in the fabric, slimming, all that good shit, and a black t-shirt from Hot Topic with Al's bloodseal from Fullmetal Alchemist on it in red, and black jeans coming soon. Total Cost: about 200 bucks, give-or-take 20. Ok, I think I look pretty damn good in this get-up. But I've been wondering: Do I think I'm sexy because I honestly think so? Or do I think I look sexy because expensive clothes are automatically good looking?
Also, I am the most arrogant, narcissistic prick you are likely to meet. I am always right, it is always about me, and I have never lost. Everybody must love me, for I am lord of wit and God of charm. However, I immediately jump to the most INSANE conclusions simply based on scant evidence. You don't contact me for two days, and it can't be your phone is broken or something dumb like that, it's I pissed you off and you are now ignoring me. I need no approval from anyone, but yet, I do. I probably shouldn't be admitting this, but once you jump through all the hoops and red tape and make to my inner circle (all of whom have done so so far, I can count on one hand.), you have almost complete control over my emotions, self-esteem, everything. Every little thing you do has an effect on me, somehow, good or bad.
I'm fucked up, insecure, negative, and emotional
I won't be lying when I say I'm F.I.N.E.
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